Crazy stuff goes down at Soho

It’s an age-old question, at what point in a civilized society does it become acceptable to resort to violence. Well, I think everyone at Soho Tea and Coffee with me tonight will agree that the line had been crossed long before the guy in question was dragged out into the street and given a thorough ass-beating, and this is me, reformed hippy and tie-dye-wearer speaking.

For everyone who wasn’t there, participating in Soho’s weekly Monday-night stand-up presentation was an unusually persistent heckler. Most of the comedians were able to shrug him off until he started to get more threatening, stealing a cell phone (and one poor guy’s stand-up notes) and starting fights with the other patrons.

At the mike was DC Improv instructor Matt Kazam, showing balls of steel for refusing to cut his set short despite increasingly violent threats with, of all things, a screwdriver. There were requests to leave which caused random profanity, and the police were taking their sweet time to show up when the guy suddenly walked across the crowded room and tried to attack someone behind the counter.

This seemed to be the final straw for the crowd of sore comedians and at that point a whole bunch of them pulled the guy outside and, according to Matt still at the mike, beat him ‘till his sandwich went all over the place’. Apparently unphased, he then got up and decided to frequent the Fireplace across the street instead.

The vigilante comedians returned to a hearty round of applause and cheers- more than their routines had elicited- high fives all around, and a free latte for at least one of them. And because attending this was a DC Improv class, the whole thing was taped. I will pay serious money if someone will get me a copy.

And if that isn’t weird enough, I then ran into my awesome old Rabbi from New York. Soho Tea and Coffee is a weird weird place.

Soho Tea and Coffee | 2150 P St.