Cheerio! (Not the cereal.)

The one week a year that I get to leave the country (in order to spend my time eating somewhere else) turns out to be the weekend of the International D.C. Wine and Food Festival. To make up for this lack of good timing, I will now tell you about everything I ate in London. Keep in mind that whenever I wasn't eating, I was walking or climbling stairs, so it is possible that some of the deliciousness was not in the food, but in the sitting.

The cafe overlooking the reading room at the British Museum serves up a very good pot of tea, substantial scones with double cream and oozy raspberry jam, and finger sandwiches: cucumber and cream cheese, smoked salmon, and ham and mustard. It's not the Ritz, but if your tea budget is closer to $17 than $70 (what does the Ritz put in the tea? Unicorn milk?), then the British Museum is a just-prissy-enough alternative, with excellent service and a really bright, gorgeous setting under the glass ceiling.

The Cow, a Notting Hill-area gastropub beloved by Lonely Planet readers, was about to get a great review for its basic, high-quality food and messy pub charm when I realized that I hadn't actually eaten anything that was created there. I had Irish oysters with a shallot mignonette and a selection of British cheeses: something old (a smooth-tasting aged cheddar), something new (and sour and brie-like), something crumbly (sheep's milk rounds) and something bleu. They also served up a "chutney" of cooked apples with lavender honey, and oat crackers and bread. It was all very satisfying, but none of the wait staff could tell me what these cheeses were or seemed eager to go ask the chef. $44 is fairly expensive for pub food, but not for wine, oysters and fine cheeses.

And the winner of the Best Food I Ate In London Is.....a mystery! If you go to Piccadilly Circus and stand on the corner with the bar that was converted from a public restroom, there is a hotel catty-corner that does not actually have a sign up indicating that Indian food is served there. Go in a sketchy-looking door and up to the first floor: where an ugly linoleum room that smells of garam masala, which may or may not be called The Indian Palace. That is where I ate the richest, most intense lamb curry I've ever had, for about $12.